When one punishes them self for wrongdoing, messing up, or any other failure, real or imaginary, they inflict emotion pain on them self. That pain can motivate one to not screw up again but it can also prevent someone from exploring other solutions if they continual obsess over the failure and do not learn to let it go. In order for you to let go of mental punishment you must spend time reflecting on what happened and imagine how it could be better. This is time out. Then from there you can make a plan how to do it differently and more successfully next time.
How you can tell if you are punishing yourself or reflecting?
Would you say it to someone you care about?
There is a time and place for both, in self care and child rearing. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to learn at your own pace. Remember, this is a journey, not a race to the finish line. It will come soon enough.
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